Praise Yourself

We’ve explored the power of kindness, and now it’s time for something many of us find uncomfortable: praising ourselves.

When we talk about how to love myself, praise is one of the most powerful, yet overlooked, tools we have. It’s how we begin to rewire old beliefs and rebuild self-worth from the inside out..

Why Praise Feels So Uncomfortable

If praise makes you squirm, you’re not alone. Many of us grew up in homes where praise was rare or conditional. Parents often worried that praising children might make them “big-headed,” or they believed criticism was a better motivator. The stick was better than the carrot!

But years of research on self-esteem and motivation show the opposite is true. Criticism breaks us down. Praise builds us up.

Think about how you react when someone compliments you:

• Do you say “thank you,” or do you dismiss it?
• Do you feel proud, or secretly uncomfortable?

These small moments reveal a lot about how we learned to relate to ourselves.

A Human Need for Recognition

We often label children as “attention-seeking,” but seeking attention is part of being human. We all need to be seen, valued, and appreciated, even as adults. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs reminds us that belonging and esteem are fundamental human needs. I like to remind my clients that it’s not attention-seeking, it’s attention-needing.

When we withhold that praise and attention from ourselves, we are starving our deep emotional need for acknowledgment.

When we start practising self-praise, we fill that gap. We remind ourselves that we are doing our best, that we are worthy of kind words, not because we’ve earned them, but just because we exist.

How to Love Praise Yourself: Start Small

Learning to praise oursleves begins with small, daily moments of appreciation. Start today by noticing what you do well, even the tiniest things:

“I got up even though I didn’t feel like it — well done.”
“I showed kindness to someone — I’m proud of that.”
“I made myself a nourishing breakfast — good for me.”

At first, it may feel awkward or even silly. That’s normal. With time, it becomes second nature. You’re retraining your brain to notice what’s right about you, not just what’s wrong. If it helps, imagine what your higher self, your best friend, or your inner child would say. Speak those words out loud. Let them land.

Journal Prompts:

• What are 5 things I like or love about myself today?
• How does it feel to receive praise or compliments?
• Do I accept or deflect them?
• What would my wiser self say to me right now?

Activity:

🕊️ For the next seven days, practice praising yourself out loud at least three times a day. Each time you do, smile, even if it feels strange. Notice how your energy shifts when you replace criticism with compassion.

Write these moments down in your journal. Over time, you’ll begin to build a new inner voice. One that speaks to you with love, patience, and pride.

🌿 Catch Up on Previous Steps in the Journey

If you’ve missed any of the earlier steps, you can catch up here:

• Step One: Stop All Criticism: How to recognise and soften your inner critic.
• Step Two: Forgive Yourself: The healing power of letting go.
• Step Three: Stop Scaring Yourself: How to calm your catastrophic thinking.
• Step Four: Be Kind and Gentle with Yourself: How to practicing self compassion.
• Step Five: Be Kind to Your Mind: How to stop negative thinking with affirmations.

Next time, we’ll explore Step Seven.

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💗 Want to work with me 1:1? Click here to book a complimentary 30 min session.

✍️ Learn how to start to journal: Enrol on my mini course ‘How to Journal for Mental Health’ HERE.

👉 Download your FREE Self-Love Affirmations here

👉 Download your FREE Feelings Wheel here

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