12 Steps to Self-Love: A Series Inspired by Louise Hay

Sep 23, 2025 | Self Healing

12 steps to self-love

Why Does Self-Love Feel So Difficult?

Firstly, “self-love” feels uncomfortable and even a bit scary. As children, we were taught to put others first, criticise ourselves into action, or to measure our worth by productivity and achievement. That old pattern: comparison, perfectionism, self-criticism makes kindness to ourselves feel awkward or undeserved.

Louise Hay, the pioneering author and teacher, offered a clear, practical pathway out of the stuckness of self-hate or self-loathing: the 12 steps to self-love. Her work is rooted in the idea that the way we speak to, think about, and care for ourselves shapes the quality of our lives. Over the next 12 weeks I’ll unpack each step, one at a time, with short reflections and simple practices you can try at home. Start taking some steps to self-love and acceptance today.

Louise Hay’s 12 Steps to Self-Love:

Each week I’ll take one of the following 12 steps, explain what it might look like in daily life, and offer small practices and questions to help you bring it into your week. The aim is not perfection, it’s small, steady change.

  1. Stop All Criticism
  2. Forgive Yourself
  3. Don’t Scare Yourself
  4. Be Gentle, Kind and Patient
  5. Be Kind to Your Mind
  6. Praise Yourself
  7. Support Yourself
  8. Love Your Negatives
  9. Take Care of Your Body
  10. Mirror Work
  11. Love Yourself and Do it Now!
  12. Have Fun

How to use this series

  • Read one post a week.
  • Try one short practice from the post each day.
  • Use the journaling prompts at the end to reflect and anchor your learning.

This is a gentle, doable approach: small actions repeated over time will start to make shifts towards loving who you are.

Tiny Act of Self-Love for Today:

Give yourself one small, practical act of kindness and notice how your body responds.

✨ A 5-minute walk in nature

✨ Butterfly hug

✨ Cup of tea without screens

✨ 10-minute rest

Next week we’ll begin with Step 1: Stop All Criticism. Follow along to get practical exercises, journal prompts, and short practices you can try at home.

🎥 You can watch me talking more about this on you tube: HERE

✨ Other Resources ✨

👉 Download your FREE Self-Love Affirmations here

#self-love #self-love #anxiety #emdr #counselling #shipley #bingley #online #therapy

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